Sunny day lesson



I had an errand I needed to run, and on my way back to my car I took this.

It was really nice outside. Probably in the 70’s. Really, I prefer say 66-68. But honestly, I can complain. We get beautiful weather year round, while others’ are freezing.

I think it’s important to step back for a minute and enjoy what is around one. The daily grind can become stressful and trying, if not monotonous at times. Having that one moment to appreciate the little things matters.

This past Tuesday, I came to realize a few things.

I was laying in my bath tub, hoping my muscles would relax with the help of the Epson salt.

As I laid there, I thought, I need to do this and this afterwards. And the thought, “Nope. I don’t want to leave here.” came to me. It seemed similar to when it’s dead of winter and bitter cold. So much so in fact that even ones home is cold even with the heater on. So the idea of leaving the warmth of the water seems daunting and highly unpleasant. Yet, I had nothing of the sort to face.  The things I needed to do I looked forward to all week.

But it’s a similar instance. It’s something to face, rather than staying in a warm comforting place.

It hit me. I had slowly but surely gotten lost within my caretaking duties mixed with normal responsibilities this past month. Which I am very happy and feel fortunate to help in every way I can. However, my balance had been tipped too much to one side. I needed to find my balance again. Someone very wise said that “You are falling out of love with yourself.” And I agree. This eloquent and short statement hit the nail on the head. I’d forgotten to step back some. I’d lost sight of myself.

We all have something unique to us. Someone might look similar to us, or have similar interests, but not even a clone of an animal looks or acts the same as it’s original. Also, I feel that at times it is frowned upon to admit one is burned out by their responsibilities or caretaking duties. Whether it is helping a parent or ones own child, etc. As though stating the obvious reality has some essence of negativity or means that one loves less. I personally whole hardheartedly disagree. Just because the existence of something is denied or goes unmentioned, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist or doesn’t affect one and those around them. We are all human and need time to also flourish ourselves.

So I found in that moment that I need to bring back a better balance into my life. To not just complete the things I need to complete for myself, but also to remember to take time for my passions. Those moments where a melody or few lyrics come to mind, let it play out, having a date night with ones husband while a responsible adult watches them, looking at what school programs you wish to pursue, or going for a run while the kids are asleep and their other parent is at home, gardening, painting, etc. Sometimes there is not much time for such moments, things get hectic. Lyrics stop coming… But sooner or later, with it hopefully being sooner rather than later, one needs to be able to have those small but meaningful moments. 

But also, I found that when stressed, it is easy to see things from only one way. Rather than finding gratitude. Or realizing if something isn’t working, there are many other options one can come up with the get the goal or result they wish to attain. Creative modifications mixed with determination and heart. The possibilities become endless and unique to us.

That is what I have learned in this past month. I’m curious Jade Gregory, what do you think?